yay... we hav finally started... hehe... 291005... yup... dats the date... =) wat i wan to say to fa is dat... indeed a few yrs of relationship cant possibly win a few months de relationship... but he wins... coz i believe in him... u didnt cherish mi in the first place... wats dere to say anymore... hmm... a bit regret in choosing bio... yes i m interested... but base on the cause n considering the future plan phy is a betta choice... bio is getting less n less important le... suan le ba... oredi choose le ma... n i believe will get in lo... sad sad sad... i cry wor... haiz... e5 splitting... not oni dat... tink 6 pple leaving... jeremy kristy simeon xinhui daniel... i tink shahila oso... sad sad sad... dunno wat will my nxt yr class b like... where r all the fun n craps??? crappy pple like azlan yongjie junting saravanan simeon... haiz... realli cant imagine... n is not juz abt leaving tis skol... daniel n simeon r going to australia... we will nvr get to meet... haiz... the chalet may b the last gathering for us ba... sobx...

yesterday was his birthday... yet till today he still get his bash... haiz... i cried nehz... today i juz keep staring at them... actually feel like shouting de... but then suan le ba... i suddenly feel v sianz... n dat question has bcome a problem between us... haiz... not happy... not happy... not happy at all... qi si wo le... getting crazy... hmm... tml last day of skol liao wor... dunno is sad or happy lei... today get report book back liao... but tml gonna hand in... sianz... n normally we will make cards or watever for teachers bcoz it is the last day... but tis yr dun hav wor... mayb busy ba... anyway i dunno wat to give frens oso... zhe me ban...

omg... omg... i m sick... i m sick... lolx... v tired... super tired... happy dat i dun hav to go skol... sad dat i dun feel good... haiz... tml still hav to go skol... realli dun feel good wor... but anyway tml is his birthday... =) happy nehz... now is not when i accepting him.. but when he gonna ask mi dat question... dats wat he said too... lolx... he is a weird guy i shld say... has his own tinkin... but treat mi good jiu hao le ba... n my third sis went back to her bf le... finally hav peace le =x hehe...

suppose to meet fa on sunday... but end up dun hav la... suan le... anyway i realli dun feel like meeting him... somemore i now oredi got him liao... =) hmm... feel v bad today... he gonna wait in skol until 6+... i cant pei him... i find dat i m not a v good gal la... he will alwaz pei mi... but dunno y he dun hav the trouble of frens... or shld i say he can dun care abt his fren bcoz of mi... dats y... but i cant lei... by rite i can de... juz dat i dun wanna my fren to say mi nia... then my second sis make mi v luan... keep tinkin abt the future n oso present la... came to no conclusion... last thing... dunno is bad or good la... my third sis is back... will b in chaos man... she got bad habit... n v inconsiderate... somemore she is materialistic... meaning she will play wif pple's feelings de... ask them pay money for her... then end up not truly love them... i dun like lei... tink my sis gonna quarrel again liao... no peace... =(

'why he ask u for patch then u reject him... he v sad lei... he smoke de whole day u noe... haiz... y u two canot b together lei... mei..' tis is wat my kor send mi... wat happen is tis... yesterday fa call mi... but i nvr ans... coz i was slping... when i wake up i saw miss call... he used my kor de hp n call mi... so i ask who call mi... tis msg oredi tell u all alot le ba... my kor keep askin mi to tink properly... coz he tink i still love him de.. n hope i wun regret... he say he can c dat he realli love mi n wan mi back... but if he realli love mi he wun hurt mi... if he realli love mi he wun break wif mi n stead wif another gal... if he realli love mi he no nd wait until now then ask for patch... he say he nvr love her b4... but th fact is he break wif mi n stead wif her... he dare to say he dun love her... if he dun love her means he oso dun love mi too... m i rite... i juz dun wanna accept... coz i noe de guy now will not hurt mi... n will love him as much as he do.. i may regret someday for choosing him... but i noe i will certainly regret if i choose fa instead of him... one will get hurt no matter who i choose... so pls dun do tis to urself anymore... dere will certainly b betta gals outside de ma...

** hmm... anyway... today is my di joel de birthday... ps ah... cant give u present... muz understand wor... lolx... k la... happy birthday n good luck to u...

i rejected him... i dun wanna say who... but not bcoz i no feelings for him at all... is bcoz he hurts mi again n again n if he realli nvr change his love for mi b4 he will ask for patch a long time ago... dats rit... mi n him noe abt 5 yrs liao... but then so wat lei... he is the one who hurt mi first de... not once... but many times... he is the one who break wif mi n stead wif another gal de nxt day de... he is oso de one who ask mi out n end up hurt mi again... wats dat for... i wun let myself get hurt again le... u will protect mi... u will nvr let anyone to hurt mi... dats wat u say... but end up u will b the one hurting mi... thanks for helping mi anyway... u say u will wait for mi... lets c how long u will wait ba... hmm... anyway tis thing i chose not to tell now de him... coz i noe he will not b happy... so might as well dun say... the most important thing i nd is true love... n i hope i nvr make the wrong decision... o.. ya... my sis came back frm canada le... hehe... she bought a bag for mi... pink nehz... however it is handbag la... but oredi v good le ba... she nvr buy anithing for anybody else nehz... lolx... hmm... one sad thing is dat my hp bill reaching 100 le... =( so ke lian... my mum nag mi since last nite... watever i do is wrong... wat she say is not wat i hav been doing... but i chose not to argue wif her... end up oso i wrong de la... anyway i hav to try to pay lo... dats all i can say...

today went to watch the skeleton key... a disappointed day la actually... hmm.. anyway it is quite a good movie... as usual we went to plaza sing... a bit sianz wif dat liao... n i was unable to take neoprint wif them... shld i say is bcoz of him or juz bcoz i dun wanna leave him alone... watever the reason is... anyway is oredi over le... hmm... he nvr send mi home... but i dun mind la..

wa... mi so damn sianz... his birthday reaching lei... but dunno wat to buy... lolx... some pple may tink i treat him badly... or take him for granted... but muz noe lei... dat is not true... i juz dun wan him to take mi for granted nia... last time i alwaz tahan my ex... end up they oso leave mi... so now muz change a little... hmm... anyway... sort of a good news... my level position has changed... frm 90 to 84... i oso dunno y... lolx... i wasnt chosen for the peer support leader thingy... dun ask mi how i feel... dun ask mi y... everybody tink it is weird... coz they alwaz tink my maths is good dats y i will get chosen... but they r wrong tis time... nvm la.. can say save trouble ba... kaoz... tok abt today... suppose to go mos burger de interview de... then the manager will oni reach aft 4... so mi n jy go shopping first lo... aft dat we went back... n the manager say he will call us again to confirm... man... cant he juz say no... nd tink so long de meh... anyway suan le ba... v sianz liao wor... v lazy... dun wanna find liao...

fine lo... dun wanna c the blog... u hav nth to say... i oso hav nth to say... wan tok then tok face to face lo... the most i cry nia ma... u tink i like to quarrel ar... c tis blog sad... i no nd c tis blog oso cry la... bcoz of wat... i admit... i put my bf b4 anybody else... got wrong mahx... if u as a fren cant understand then forget it lo... it is oredi guo fen enough lo... u say u dun wan to noe anithing abt him... then dun say lo... dats wat u wan ba... is u dun wan mi say de lo... abt the organise the thingy i dun wanna care... say until like my fault again... i wun say sorie... i will nvr say... the most is i dun go the chalet la... suan le... i hav nth to say... i dun wan to solve tis... i dun hav to solve tis... leave mi alone n get lost...

hmm... i may hav some frenship de prob... but... one thing i hav to highlight is dat... i m not going to say sorie when i m not in the wrong... last time i may b in the wrong... but not now... now bcome like tis dun tell mi she is blaming mi... we didnt quarrel... we juz get distant nia... everybody shld noe... it is so damn obvious... i may not b happy wif her sometimes... but i nvr tink of stop tokin to her... she is the one who alwaz do all tis... i gonna heck tis time... coz i canot tahan anymore... tis time i realli tink i dun hav to say sorie... she may tink... we nvr get distant ah... but wat u all tink??? pple... so damn obvious de thingy... though i nvr mention who... u all shld noe who ba... i tink i hav oredi tried my best le... she wan liddat then not my prob la... even our choice is so much different... i nvr ask her... she nvr ask mi... n if she tink she can hav another good fren n not mi then let it b... i oso can get alot of good fren... not oni her... if we r back again i dun wanna hear her complain anymore... is not dat i wan to say... i did so much for the class n no one appreciate... watever i do i nvr tink of getting anithing in return... zhen de... yup... she can say is the main organiser... can say she do most the things... but wat abt mi??? i did nth??? tis time i wun help in the chalet... i may not even go... pple may tink is bcoz of my results... let mi tell u all... NO... mi n her hav been planning all along... n now she dun treat mi as one of the organiser... fine then... i dun wanna help... i m not gonna help... though others say lets b the organisers together... pls tink man... even if we say we r the organisers hav she realli ask us wat we wan... decide le n tell us... dats all... no one is perfect... i can say she is my good fren... in fact best fren... but i dun tink she is perfect... being best fren doesnt mean u will like her everything... juz the feeling ba... if she c tis i dun mind... i speak out my mind nia... she may b angry... but tis is wat actually happen... if i were the one who see tis i will juz b sad... even if tis is a misunderstanding i still tink she shld juz make things clear... n not angry wif mi bcoz she tink tis is not the way... anyway i dun tink she gonna c tis... she nvr pay much attention to my blog...

spoil my mood man...

haiz... y let mi saw u lo... i nvr seen u since 22 may lo... y muz u appear again... gold hair wif red at the bottom back... quite cool... grow tall le oso... i dun wan to ask myself how i feel... i juz noe i m not happy to c u... hmm... i tink i hav made my choices...

1) B5
2) B2
3) A1
4) D2
5) E2
6) B6

OMG!!! i 'deprove'!!!

man... man.. 'deprove' liao... 'deprove' liao... everybody tink i m sad ba... for my maths... the v first time in Zhonghua i get 70+... lolx... sad la... v sad... but then over liao ma... wat can i do lei... i used to b a person who v bo chup in results de... but tis time i chup a little... coz i work v hard... which i dunno y too... can say dat pple who noe how hard i hav been studying for tis time will b shocked... coz i nvr study dat hard b4... yet i did not manage to improve or get wat u wan... i 'deprove'!!! omg... omg... class position drop frm 7 to 21... level position frm 38 to 90!!! omg... omg... so damn sad... but then ok la... still top 100... my class is too wat liao la... 21 in class can get 90 in skol... lolx... first in class get first in skol nehz... buey tahan... still quite sad de... n i v fan abt which course n subject to choose... for humanities... i hope to hav 2... so dat i can choose the betta one instead of takin 1 which i dun even noe whether i can score... get double sci... no triple sci... a bit too much... n oni 1 human... dun wan combine too... coz oni got 1 sci results... but i still make them as my choices... humanites i choose lit n hist... no geo... geo sucks... somemore i fail my geo tis yr... sci i finally came out the decision of bio... chem is a compul... however in my 6 choices... i hav both phy n bio de... both double sci n combine sci... both 8 subjects n 7 subjects... dere is alwaz pros n cons... 8 sub hav more chances... 7 sub hav more concentration... so i realli dunno... i tink 8 sub betta... the course which i realli wanna go is B5...

how can it b u??? sobx...

wo zhen de hao shang xin wor... i hate nobody except LIARS!!! y muz it b u... how can u lie to mi... though i noe u didnt mean to... but i juz cant accept when pple lie to mi... i m not angry... i m crying... haiz... u will nvr noe... let mi repeat it again... I WILL NVR ALLOW ANYONE TO HURT MI!!! i mean it... i realli mean it... haiz... sobx... y r u the one... i dun hate u... but... i dunno whether i gonna accept le... zhen de...

nxt topic... get back most of my paper today... omg... so damn lan... haiz... i tink i 'deprove' le... but no matter wat i dun tink i will go combine sci ba... i hope not... pray god... i wanna go double sci... haiz... my maths... even my maths canot help mi tis time... wat happen to mi man... i juz felt dat i m letting Mr Leong down... zhen de... dunno how to face him... other subjects r considered improve lo... oni maths... n is so jialat... haiz... man... i study so hard... i nvr study so hard b4 lo... end up is the same... feel so stress tis time... i dunno when hav i bcome like tis... last time is heck care type... but then anyway i oso nvr tink much la... is oredi over le ma...

nvr allow anyone to hurt mi again

i tink i getting cold-blooded liao... lolx... now in order not to let anyone hurt mi... everything has to tink carefully... hate the feeling of rejecting pple... but... i will nvr let u hurt mi de!!! dats wat i m trying to say... of coz if get hurt le i wun hate him la... is i make the choice de ma... so now everything muz hav serious tinkin de... but i realli dun like pple tok to u when they wan jio u... aft u reject they wun find u le... wats frens for man... dats y when rejecting pple i oredi noe tis will happen le... dun like... hmm... anyway yesterday went to plaza sing to watch dark water... wif HIM... lolx... but not exactly a horror movie lo... no choice... now no movie lei... actually wan go bugis... but bugis dun hav dark water... too bad lo... then plaza sing walk less than 2 hours then sianz liao... he so ke lian... i noe he wanna eat... but i dun wan... so he pei mi walk... he everything oso ask mi de... everything oso listen to mi... we go times... then he saw many books he like... but keep saying ex... i tink i will buy one for him ba... not he no $ nehz... juz dat he wanna buy wallet nia... then he go buy quik silver de wallet... lolx.. he alwaz spend more than mi de... then aft dar go his fren de hse... nth to do dere... play wif dogs n watch tv lo...

a tiring day

lolx... today went to MingLi hse... then suntan... then swim... then play pool... then lastly go out of coz... lolx... went to far east... then aft dat heeren... take one neoprint nia... actually wan two de... but too bad la... went to find jobs... shld say quite successful or not successful at all lei... i dunno... but then anyway is super tired la... sunburn!!! cant say i dun wan sunburn la... go suntan then is surely tio sunburn one ma... juz dat it is damn pain... damn red too... lolx... heck la... happy jiu hao... hmm... tis few days nvr tok to him much le... he busy ma... i believe him la... he will msg mi when he feels like de... tink he wun forget mi??? lolx... but then i dunno lei... he n my other ex r diff... how to say lei... juz gave mi a diff feeling lo... mi n him belong to a real mature relationship... i dunno is good or bad la... i dunno whether bcoz we r not suitable then liddat... or bcoz it is time for mi to settle down n go for my v last relationship... actually i realli dunno... a bit luan... sometimes a bit fan... tml nehz... actually wanna go out together de... i tink i noe wat we can do la... juz dat he today like so busy playing his soccer... till now haven msg mi... dunno is forgot or realli haven play finish... suan le... i wun blame him de... if he rmb our date tml then go out lo... dun rmb then forget it lo... it is not a muz for mi to go out too... lolx... hmm... i juz feel like tokin abt some of my ex... in fact all?? but dun wanna name them la...

first one... in primary skol de... P6... tis relationship to mi now is juz puppy love... not serious de la... cant b serious too... i dun tink he truly love mi too... though it seems like we both like each other v long le... lolx...

second one... hmm... P6 to Sec 1 de... during the holiday ba... at first like him a little nia... aft dat more le... then y break i oso forgot le... but juz a short period nia... lolx... paiseh ah...

third one... in Sec 1... n tis one we break n patch... break n patch... dunno y la... not quarrel or watever... juz he look down on himself... but now is no feeling le... mayb he did come back to mi... but i will say no... coz realli no feeling... moreover i dun tink he truly love mi... n i will nvr give him a chance to hurt mi anymore...

fourth one... oso in Sec 1... but nehz... tis is in between the third one... the period which we r separated... hmm... sad to say dat it is juz one day... he is damn good... but i dun get used to the way he treats mi... then tink not suitable then break lo... tis is the first time i wanna break... but dun tink i make the wrong choice la...

fifth one... oso in Sec 1... oso between the period which i was separated frm the third one... tis is the oldest stead i hav ever had... n oso he is much more experiences... tis period is short too... coz not suitable... n somemore i was juz a kid... lolx...

now... the latest one... Sec 2... tis one is a memorable one... coz i love him quite long ba... he oso love mi quite long le... n somehow i believe is fate which bring us together... everytime things happen juz as if fate is helping us... dun nd to explain much... go to my archive n u will noe... tis blog is actually for him... but find it troublesome to make a new one... i love him v much... zhen de... but he hurts mi too much le... not once nia... although sad... i will nvr give u the chance to hurt mi again...

u finally msg mi le... lolx... oni hope u wun tink mi dun xiang u dats y nvr msg u first... not liddat de... is i noe u will b going out ah... so wait for u to b free lo... believe u will msg mi if u r free ma... tis is call trust k... lolx... today go meet huimin... of coz do the usual thing... eat n watch tv lo.. go her hse is nth to do one... last time sad then will go her hse... actualy wo you dian fan... coz i realli dunno... anyway i dun wanna say... haiz...

things which i believe in...
1) no matter how or wat u say abt him i wun care... i believe him as the one i noe he is...
2) no matter how bad he is to any other pple i dun care... i believe he will treat mi gd which he shld...
3) past is a past... as long as i let u go i will not turn back... as long as i treat u as a memory i wun turn back... i will oni turn back if i tink u r a new beginning... pls dun say u regret in wat u hav oredi decided... wats done canot b undone...
4) love is a mature frenship... if even aft everything is over we cant b fren then let alone tokin abt love...
5) pple ard mi shld b appreciated by mi... once my kor forever my kor... once my jie forever my jie... once my fren forever my fren... once my sista forever my sista...
6) i can b a best fren than anithing else... good listener n advisor is wat i can promise to u...

last day of exam...

yay... today my last exam nehz... finally... then mon to wed no nd go skol liao... cant c u le... mayb tue??? i dunno lei... mayb shld test us for 5 days??? hmm... i feel so bad today... u hav to cancel order bcoz of mi... then jk they all say u pang seh... so sorie wor... today we go chinatown... coz my fren wan look at cd ma... then aft dat go suntec... we were looking for the pet shop dere.. but cant nehz... my fren told mi it is near the carpark on my way home... hmm... anyway quite happy la... first time going out??? then i dunno if we realli go out alone will we hav anithing to tok abt... but today get to noe each other betta... the things he buy n the things he wan r all so ex dat type de... i wonder whether my birthday present worth alot... a bit dan xin... but the thing is dat u r more of eng type... i m more of chi type... realli dun mind mahx??? lolx... anyway i realise u r so cute... caring too... good guy ya... 3 things i noe frm my sis n oso thru some thinking...

1) how ur bf treat his fren or other pple oso doesnt matter as long as he treats u gd

2) no matter how pple say abt him u dun care as long as u noe u love him

3) ur bf dun hav to treat ur fren good bcoz it is u whom he has to b good to n who realli nd his care

yay

wa... finally... aft so long... last few days cant post nehz... lolx... now my first sis go canada liao... third sis going thailand soon... aft dat she will move back to live wif us... shld i say is good or bad lei??? sometimes buey tahan her bad habit... but then nvm la... hmm... tok abt exam... man... hui si de lo... bcome more n more nerdy le... lolx... end paper ok la... actually can say all the paper sure pass de... i work so hard tis time... if fail then jump down the building liao... lolx... but maths oredi minus away ard 10 marks for paper one liao... siao one lo... i dun even hav the time to realli finish... somemore got some is careless... feel so sianz... then science... kaoz... oso careless lo... 10 marks gone too... super sianz nehz... but overall still ok la... hmm... i dun wanna tok abt anybody... wo hen kai xin jiu shi le... lolx...